The authors argue that early human societies were likely more egalitarian and sexually open. They delve into anthropology, primatology, and psychology to support their claims. The book suggests that the agricultural revolution changed the social dynamics, leading to the property-oriented and monogamous structures we see today. Before that, sharing resources—including sexual partners—was more common and even beneficial for social cohesion.

They also critique the "standard narrative" that men are naturally inclined to spread their seed while women are looking for long-term security, calling it a cultural construct rather than a biological imperative. The book is pretty provocative and has sparked a lot of debates, but it's a compelling read if you're interested in the complexities of human sexuality and social structures.

Main Points:

1. Challenging the Standard Narrative: The book starts by questioning the "standard narrative" of human sexuality, which posits that men are hardwired to spread their genes through multiple partners, while women seek emotional and financial security. Ryan and Jethá argue that this narrative is more a product of agricultural society and less a hardwired biological reality.

2. Pre-Agricultural Societies: The authors delve into the sexual norms of hunter-gatherer societies, which they argue were more communal and less possessive. In these societies, sexual relationships were not confined to monogamous pairs but were more fluid and less tied to long-term commitments.

3. The Role of Agriculture: With the advent of agriculture, property and "ownership" became central to human life, including relationships. This led to the rise of monogamy as a way to ensure lineage and inheritance. The authors argue that this shift was more social and economic than biological.

4. Bonobos vs. Chimpanzees: The book discusses our closest relatives, bonobos and chimpanzees, to highlight different models of sexuality. While chimps are often violent and hierarchical, bonobos are more egalitarian and use sex for social bonding. The authors suggest that humans are more like bonobos than chimps in their natural state.

5. Jealousy and Possessiveness: Ryan and Jethá argue that jealousy is not a natural emotion but a cultural construct tied to the idea of possession. They claim that in more communal societies, what we call "jealousy" is less prevalent.

6. Modern Implications: The book concludes by examining how understanding our "natural" state could help address modern issues like infidelity, sexual dissatisfaction, and the high divorce rate.

Criticisms and Controversies:

The book has been both praised and criticized. Critics often point out that Ryan and Jethá rely heavily on anecdotal evidence and that their arguments sometimes lack rigorous scientific backing. However, supporters appreciate the book for challenging deeply ingrained beliefs about human sexuality and offering a different perspective.

https://samples.audible.com/bk/adbl/002536/bk_adbl_002536_sample.mp3