Relationship Talk

Different Types Of ENM Dynamics. We all have our own ideas as to what makes sex great! Sex is as unique as the person having it. What makes YOU tick is exclusive and reserved only for you. Yes, we may enjoy something similar to others or have shared fantasies and desires, however, the emotions, the sensations and the particular way that your body responds to sex is deeply personal. We may have wants and desires that we share, but only we know our true comfort levels. There is no right or wrong w...

Male Insecurities And Swinging- Help! I Can't Get Hard! Recently, I received a question from one of my male followers, who wanted to ask for my thoughts on male sexual performance and how I deal with a situation where a guy loses his erection during a swinger party. Could I share any insight into how men could deal with this and how it makes women feel? Was there a right or wrong way to deal with it? Any 'Erectile Disfunction Etiquette' that should be followed? First of all, it is important to...

What Happens When A Couple Go From Monogamy to Ethical Non-Monogamy? Going from a previously monogamous relationship to a newly Ethically non-monogamous one is something that needs careful consideration, communication and compromise. When you are looking to explore Ethical Non-Monogamy, it can be hard to know where to begin and what might happen to your relationship. Very often the biggest question a couple has is ‘is this going to jeopardise our relationship? I understand what it is like, whi...

What Is It Like Seeing Your Partner With Someone Else? For many of us, seeing our partner with someone else is the stuff of our nightmares. Watching as they kiss, touch, and, well, get it on with another person (usually of the opposite sex) is, for the majority of couples, the one thing they are absolutely terrified of. Or are they? Are there, instead, some couples who actively enjoy watching their partner with someone else? And do all couples feel the same about seeing their dear beloved in t...

The Unexpected Pregnancy Hi Rosie, my partner and I have been swinging for a year now, and it has been amazing. But something insane happened recently – I found out I'm pregnant. The thing is, I'm not sure if the baby is my partner's or one of the guys we've been swinging with. My partner doesn't know yet, and I'm freaking out about what to do. Should I come clean to my partner and risk our relationship and our swinging lifestyle, or should I keep it to myself and hope the baby looks like him? ...

Extramonogamous Non-monogamous relationships come in many forms, each with its own set of rules, norms, and expectations. Terms like Ethical Non-Monogamy (ENM), Consensual Non-Monogamy (CNM), Open Relationships, Swinging, and Polyamory are commonly used to describe various relationship dynamics that extend beyond traditional monogamy. However, these terms can sometimes lead to confusion, especially regarding partner consent within these relationships. We propose a new term: extramonogamous, to...

What Happens When A Couple Go From Monogamy to Ethical Non-Monogamy    Last week, I was speaking with one of you lovely members here in CNM4US, who asked me if I created content about ENM or if it was just swinging. The answer is yes, yes I do, and although I am perhaps a little 'swinger heavy' at times (ok, I am quite swinger lifestyle focussed), I do indeed create ENM content, too. So here, for you, is an article I wrote all about transitioning from Monogamy to Ethical Monogamy, which is a...

Hi Rosie, I am scared of talking to my partner about starting swinging; I just don’t know how they will react!    POV: You are scared of your partner’s reaction or there being repercussions when you share your fantasies or make suggestions about the lifestyle.   Why? Why is it that we struggle to talk about intimacy, human nature and sexual desire in our relationships? Because we don’t want to jeopardise the good thing we have built, we don’t want to cause upset and insecurity and potentiall...

Hi, Rosie, Is your wife cuckolding you with your boss too risky? I'd love to hear your thoughts on this, as it's something that has been going around in my mind for so long. Do you think it's possible, or am I just going to cause problems by even suggesting it? Thank you for your question.   Thank you for your question, Cuckolding is a practice I have written about previously and a dynamic that I myself have practised. It appears that cuckolding and Ethical Non-Monogamy go hand in hand, but to...

How Your Gut Health Can Be a Libido Booster by Camila Sluman | Jul 3, 2024 | SEXUALITY Yes, you read the title right. Perhaps unexpectedly, the gut plays a potent role in sexual vitality. While gut health has become a hot topic recently, its connection to other bodily functions besides digestion (including things like anxiety and, of course, sexual health) is lesser known. Keep reading to learn more about how and why a flourishing gut microbiome can help produce an increased libido. ...

How to Find an LGBTQ Affirming Therapist by Dr. Kat Arenella | Jul 7, 2024 | LGBTQ, MENTAL HEALTH, SOCIAL ISSUES, THERAPY If you identify as part of the LGBTQIA2S+ community, finding affirming mental health care can feel like a daunting task. This concern is also, unfortunately, a valid one; many sexual and gender minoritized folks report experiencing harm by providers who lack understanding and knowledge in queer mental health, and this is especially true for queer and trans people of color. ...

Yikes, my partner is moving too fast!   Hi Rosie, my partner and I started swinging about six months ago, and we met a couple in private who we found online. We also visited a swingers club three times. Although I enjoy it, and I am on board with it, my male partner, whom I have been with for 2 years, often gets very 'fired up' when speaking to other swingers online or looking at clubs. I understand that he is enthusiastic, but I often feel he makes decisions without considering how I might fe...

Ask Rosie- Your Swinger Lifestyle Problems Solved! When I first started in the swinger lifestyle, I really struggled to find help, guidance and support. I felt there wasn't anyone to who I could talk, and when I did look online for answers, I found it difficult to relate to those who were providing the answers; most appeared to be older, US-based couples whose experiences had been completely different from my own. I also found I was unable to talk to my friends as I was fearful of being judged,...

Freely given. Consenting is a choice you make without pressure, manipulation, or under the influence of drugs or alcohol. Reversible. Anyone can change their mind about what they feel like doing, anytime. Even if you’ve done it before, and even if you’re both naked in bed. Informed. You can only consent to something if you have the full story. For example, if someone says they’ll use a condom and then they don’t, there isn’t full consent. Enthusiastic. When it comes to sex, you should o...

Psychology Today maintains a database of therapists who embrace Non-Monogamy.  You can search by city and zip code. Follow the link below to jump to their search page.  

Therapy Den is an online directory for all types of therapists, inclucing sex postivie therapists who specialize in non-monogamous couples.