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January 7, 2025
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Author: Lauren Hayse
See Swinging Lifestyle Coach
For Better or Even Better
7 Lessons on Life & Love from a Non-Monogamist
Discover the candid, transformative journey of a relationship coach navigating life and love outside traditional boundaries. In this insightful guide, readers are invited into a world where transparency, emotional honesty, and vulnerability shape relationships—both monogamous and non-monogamous. With a unique blend of humor, personal anecdotes, and deep wisdom, this boo...
February 25, 2024
17 Views
The Swinging Paradigm: An Evaluation of the Marital and Sexual Satisfaction of Swingers
Electronic Journal of Human Sexuality, Volume 12, January 23, 2009
By Edward M. Fernandes
"The Swinging Paradigm" by Edward M. Fernandes provides an in-depth analysis of the swinging lifestyle, focusing on the marital and sexual satisfaction of swingers. The introduction highlights the development of Fernandes' interest in the topic, spurred by an article questioning whether family values can survive sexua...
February 25, 2024
16 Views
Porn in Their Words: Female Leaders in the Adult Entertainment Industry Address Free Speech, Censorship, Feminism, Culture and the Mainstreaming of Adult Content
Vanderbilt Journal of Entertainment & Technology Law
Volume 9
Issue 2 - Winter 2006
This journal article "Porn in Their Words: Female Leaders in the Adult Entertainment Industry Address Free Speech, Censorship, Feminism, Culture, and the Mainstreaming of Adult Content" is a comprehensive exploration into the intersection of the adul...
February 2, 2024
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In her memoir, “More,” Molly Roden Winter recounts the highs and lows of juggling an open marriage with work and child care.
By Alexandra Alter
For anyone prone to experiencing secondhand embarrassment, there’s a scene in Molly Roden Winter’s debut, “More: A Memoir of Open Marriage,” that should come with a warning.
Winter is at her home in Brooklyn. She has just had sex with her boyfriend while her two children sleep upstairs. Her husband, Stewart, consented to her tryst, but feeling guilt...
December 26, 2023
20 Views
A smart, sexy guide to embracing the repressed, tabooed, and often unwanted aspects of ourselves so we can discover our inner power and finally live the life we deserve.
“We always get exactly what we want; but often, though we may not be aware of it, what we most want is dark—very dark.”
Each of us has a dual nature: we are light (conscious) and dark (unconscious). The dark side of our personality—the “other,” the shadow side—is made up of what we think is our primitive, primal, negative impu...
December 26, 2023
18 Views
A leading expert on human sexuality and author of the blog Sex and Psychology offers an unprecedented look at sexual fantasy based on the most comprehensive, scientific survey ever undertaken.
What do Americans really want when it comes to sex? And is it possible for us to get what we want? Justin J. Lehmiller, one of the country's leading experts on human sexuality and author of the popular blog Sex and Psychology, has made it his career's ambition to answer these questions. He recently conclu...
December 2, 2023
22 Views
"The Smart Girl's Guide to Polyamory: Everything You Need to Know About Open Relationships, Non-Monogamy, and Alternative Love" by Dedeker Winston is a comprehensive and insightful book that delves into the world of polyamory and non-monogamous relationships. Here's a review of the book:
Overview
Dedeker Winston's book serves as an informative guide, particularly aimed at women, though it's valuable for anyone interested in exploring polyamory. It covers a wide range of topics, from the basics...
December 2, 2023
19 Views
Author: Terence H. Hull PhD
Terence H. Hull PhD (2008) Sexual Pleasure and Wellbeing, International Journal of Sexual Health, 20:1-2, 133-145, DOI: 10.1080/19317610802157234
Overview
The article discusses the complex relationship between sexual pleasure and overall wellbeing, highlighting the challenges in integrating sexual pleasure into the broader sexual health agenda. It emphasizes the need for a deeper understanding and recognition of sexual pleasure as a crucial aspect of holistic healt...
December 2, 2023
20 Views
Authors: Bente Træen & Frode Thuen
Bente Træen & Frode Thuen (2022) Non-consensual and Consensual Non-monogamy in Norway, International Journal of Sexual Health, 34:1, 65-80, DOI: 10.1080/19317611.2021.1947931
Overview
The study explores the experiences of Norwegians with both non-consensual and consensual non-monogamy. It aims to provide insights into how these practices are related to relationship intimacy and attitudes towards sex and sexuality.
Methodology
...
November 28, 2023
18 Views
"The State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity" by Esther Perel offers a nuanced examination of infidelity in relationships. Perel, a respected couples therapist, presents a controversial perspective that infidelity can ultimately be beneficial for relationships. This does not mean that she advocates for infidelity; rather, she explores how affairs can compel partners to closely reevaluate their attitudes about love, commitment, and sex.
The book is lauded for its insightful and balanced approach...
November 28, 2023
17 Views
"Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence" by Esther Perel is a profound exploration of the intricate relationship between domesticity and sexual desire. Perel, a renowned therapist, delves into the paradoxical union of these two aspects and offers guidance on rekindling passion in long-term relationships.
The book is celebrated for its insightful and counterintuitive approach to modern relationships. Perel's expertise in couples therapy informs her exploration of maintaining desire a...
November 28, 2023
17 Views
"Opening Up" is a comprehensive guide on non-monogamous relationships, written by Tristan Taormino, a well-known author and educator on sexuality. The book is often recommended for its practical advice, in-depth research, and inclusive approach to various forms of non-monogamous relationships. Taormino combines personal anecdotes, interviews with people in open relationships, and practical advice to provide a thorough overview of the subject.
Key topics covered in the book include:
Differen...
November 28, 2023
18 Views
"Feminist Trauma Theologies: Body, Scripture & Church in Critical Perspective," edited by Karen O’Donnell and Katie Cross, is a groundbreaking collection that explores the intersection of trauma, theology, and feminist perspectives. This compilation is significant in its approach to trauma theology, a field that acknowledges the enduring impact of traumatic experiences and seeks to integrate these experiences within theological discourse.
The book is described as a revelatory journey, sometimes...
November 28, 2023
17 Views
"Nadia Bolz-Weber's book *Shameless: A Sexual Reformation* is a provocative and insightful critique of traditional Christian teachings on sexuality. Bolz-Weber, a former pastor, draws from her personal experiences, as well as those of her friends and congregants, to challenge and reformulate Christian perspectives on sex, gender, and relationships.
The book is described as a mix of memoir and call to action. Bolz-Weber's critique is grounded in biblical texts and the perspectives of both early ...
November 28, 2023
17 Views
Linda Kay Klein's book, "Pure: Inside the Evangelical Movement That Shamed a Generation of Young Women and How I Broke Free," delves into the consequences of purity culture within evangelical Christianity, particularly its impact on girls and young women. The book is described as a contentious debut, blending Klein's personal experiences with a broader exploration of evangelical purity culture.
Klein reflects on her upbringing as a conservative Evangelical Christian and the sexual shaming she e...
November 28, 2023
18 Views
"Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle," authored by sisters Emily Nagoski, Ph.D., and Amelia Nagoski, D.M.A., is a comprehensive exploration of the phenomena of burnout, particularly focusing on how it affects women. The book presents burnout as a condition with three primary components: emotional exhaustion (the fatigue from caring too much for too long), depersonalization (the depletion of empathy, caring, and compassion), and a decreased sense of accomplishment (a feeling of futi...
September 29, 2023
17 Views
This is the summary of article taken from: https://www.shipspsychology.com.au
If you like the summary, we encourage you to follow the link below to their site to read the entire article.
The Gist
The article is written from a psychologist's perspective and aims to guide people who are interested in exploring non-monogamy but are unsure how to initiate that conversation with their partner. It stresses that both monogamous and non-monogamous relationships can be ethical and fulfilling.
...
September 26, 2023
20 Views
For much of the 20th and 21st centuries, women’s sexuality was an uncharted territory in science, studied far less frequently—and far less seriously—than its male counterpart.
That is, until Emily Nagoski’s Come As You Are, which used groundbreaking science and research to prove that the most important factor in creating and sustaining a sex life filled with confidence and joy is not what the parts are or how they’re organized but how you feel about them. In the years since the book’s initial...
September 9, 2023
20 Views
"Poly Secure: Attachment, Trauma, and Consensual Non-Monogamy" by Jessica Fern is a game-changer for folks interested in or practicing polyamory or other forms of consensual non-monogamy (CNM). The book aims to fuse attachment theory with the dynamics of CNM relationships, providing a nuanced understanding of how people in such relationships can create secure attachments.
Main Themes
Attachment Theory: Jessica Fern delves into how our attachment styles (secure, anxious, avoidant, etc.) i...
September 9, 2023
21 Views
The authors argue that early human societies were likely more egalitarian and sexually open. They delve into anthropology, primatology, and psychology to support their claims. The book suggests that the agricultural revolution changed the social dynamics, leading to the property-oriented and monogamous structures we see today. Before that, sharing resources—including sexual partners—was more common and even beneficial for social cohesion.
They also critique the "standard narrative" that men are...
September 9, 2023
19 Views
By Natalie Babcock | Los Angele Times
Sept. 8, 2023 5 AM PT
Last spring, after eight years of a stable partnership, my husband and I opened our marriage. In truth, I was the one to push for this change in the first place. For many, this disclosure would have been an absolute curveball. But fortunately Sam and I had been fleshing out the parameters of ethical nonmonogamy for some time, theoretically musing about the drawbacks of long-term partnership since our third date.
...
August 15, 2023
22 Views
Claire Kimberly and Robert McGinley
To cite this article: Claire Kimberly & Robert McGinley (2018): Changes in the swinging lifestyle: a US national and historical comparison, Culture, Health & Sexuality, DOI:10.1080/13691058.2018.1460692
Abstract
The paper aims to understand how the swinging lifestyle has evolved over time, comparing data from the 1980s to 2016. The study found that compared to the general population, swingers are more likely to be Caucasian, younger, educated, and wealthy. ...
August 15, 2023
22 Views
Claire Kimberly, Jason D. Hans
Received: 5 July 2014 / Revised: 31 August 2015 / Accepted: 7 September 2015
Springer Science+Business Media New York 2015
Abstract
The paper focuses on swinger couples—committed couples who consensually engage in extra-relational sex for recreational purposes. The study aims to understand the experiences of such couples, especially how they transition into and maintain marital satisfaction in the swinging lifestyle. The paper is based on 32 semi-structured in...
August 15, 2023
24 Views
Claire Kimberly
Abstract
The paper aims to validate a theoretical model formed by Kimberly and Hans in 2017 that explored how swinging relationships were initiated and maintained. This study tests the theory with 273 self-identified swingers through an online survey. The results mostly supported the previous model but found two exceptions: participants disagreed with having high self-esteem prior to entering the lifestyle and that men (rather than women) screened potential partners.
Key Point...
August 15, 2023
22 Views
Claire Kimberly & Amanda L. Williams & Stacy Creel
© Springer Science+Business Media New York 2017
Abstract
The paper explores the relationship between women's consumption of erotica, particularly BDSM-focused literature like "Fifty Shades of Grey," and their sexual and relationship satisfaction. The study aims to understand how erotica introduces women to alternative sexual behaviors like BDSM and how this affects their relationships and overall well-being.
Key Points
...
August 15, 2023
22 Views
Gurit E. Birnbaum, Yaniv Kanat-Maymon, Moran Mizrahi, May Recanati, and Romy Orr
Abstract
The paper explores how sexual fantasies affect relationships. It focuses on "dyadic fantasies" (fantasies about one's partner) and "extradyadic fantasies" (fantasies about someone other than one's partner). The study aims to understand how these fantasies contribute to relationship outcomes and the mechanisms that underlie this connection.
Key Points
...
August 15, 2023
21 Views
Abstract
The paper argues for the value of compersion, a term used in non-monogamous communities to describe positive feelings towards a partner's intimacy with other people. The author challenges the idea that jealousy is a natural or virtuous emotional disposition, suggesting that compersion focuses on the flourishing of others and is not akin to pride, vicarious enjoyment, or masochistic pleasure.
Key Points
...
August 15, 2023
21 Views
When it comes to commitment, does sexual orientation make a difference?
Posted September 27, 2014 | Reviewed by Jessica Schrader
Our world loves simple, black-and-white categories, and life is not always easy for the people who don’t easily fit in the resulting dichotomies—gay or straight; male or female.
Consider bisexuals, often unwelcome in both straight and gay/lesbian communities. The list of stereotypes about bisexuals is long: confused; in transition; greedy; repressed homosexuals; att...
August 15, 2023
22 Views
What the experiences of nonmonogamous couples can tell us about jealousy, love, desire and trust.
By Susan Dominus
...
August 15, 2023
21 Views
Description
Relationships aren't "one-size-fits-all" so why should relationship advice be? Multiamory offers practical, research-based communication tools for the full spectrum of modern relationships.
When Multiamory authors Dedeker Winston, Emily Sotelo Matlack, and Jase Lindgren started producing their advice show about polyamory and other non-traditional relationships, they received dozens of questions from listeners about all sorts of relationship quandaries and communication stalema...
Featured Blogs
January 7, 2025
Author: Lauren Hayse
See Swinging Lifestyle Coach
For Better or Even Better
7 Lessons on Life & Love from a Non-Monogamist
Discover the candid, transformative journey of a relationship coach navigating life and love outside traditional boundaries. In this insightful guide, readers are invited into a world where transparency, emotional honesty, and vulnerability shape relationships—both monogamous and non-monogamous. With a unique blend of humor, personal anecdotes, and deep wisdom, this boo...
August 14, 2023
CNM4US Mission
This purpose of this website is to create a sex-positive space for people to explore consensual non-monogamy.
Education
Titilation
...
March 24, 2024
Welcome to CNM4US!
Imagine a mashup between Facebook's social media features and Match.com's date matching features. Nude and erotic photos are allowed. The date matching features are oriented toward Consensual Non-Monogamy.
That's CNM4US. Well, except for all the negativity. Facebook can keep that. This site is heavily moderated.
Dating Site
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